Highland Archer Page 16

  “You are so handsome. I can see the difference between you and Steaphan. Your face is a bit broader. And you seem to be sterner. Of course, it could be you don’t know me.” Sorcha had continued talking and he’d halfway listened, his mind on Ariana.

  Finally, she stood. “I will go and allow you some privacy. I tend to prattle on.” She waited for him to stand as well and she reached up and cupped his face. “I know you don’t know me, but I do love you, Darach, and am so very happy that you are here. Consider staying. It would mean a lot to Steaphan.”

  “And your mother?” He didn’t know why he said it. Perhaps because the woman seemed cold and distant, he wondered if she was the same with Sorcha.

  “Mother keeps her emotions well hidden. I am sure she is relieved you are here as well.” Sorcha left and Valent sat back on the chair and drank the rest of the mead.

  He wasn’t sure he could attend the evening meal. It was not time to face everything yet.

  * * *

  “Sorcha was disappointed when you didn’t come to the evening meal.” Steaphan entered the room that evening and settled into a chair by the fireplace, ignoring that Valent continued to stand.

  Although he’d awaited the day his brother would finally deem it time to make an appearance, he wondered if any information the man gave would make a difference in his decision to travel as far as he could from both the McLeods and the McKenzies.

  “I only remained to hear what you have to say. It is doubtful I will stay after that.” Valent moved to the chair opposite where Steaphan sat, but stood next to it. “I cannot think of anything that will convince me to remain in Gladdaugh.”

  “When was the last time you were treated as such?” Steaphan motioned around the rooms with his arms outstretched. “This is what you deserve, what your life should be.”

  The answer was obvious, so Valent did not reply.

  Steaphan’s lips curved. “I have pondered a great deal and tried to understand what you feel. How you perceive us here at Gladdaugh. We are strangers. The enemy of your people.”

  “The McLeods are not my people. I have no clan.”

  Steaphan got to his feet. “You have made that perfectly clear. You have no clan. To remain without family is your choice at this point.”

  He pinned Valent with a steady stare. “Have you considered how we felt at losing you? Stop to think a moment of how much Sorcha and I cried at missing you. Father was so distraught he had to be held back from punishing the men who dared to return empty handed after searching for weeks. So much was his grief that he never fully recovered from the melancholy.”

  Steaphan studied Valent with an angry glare. “Yes, you were left to fend for yourself. And perhaps had a very hard life. But we tried to find you. If you were not found at the McLeods it is because everyone denied any knowledge of a young foundling.”

  Valent had not considered it. Every word Steaphan spoke painted a picture of a family in pain, hurting for the loss of a child.

  His brother was not finished; Steaphan neared and gripped Valent’s shoulder. “The reason for your coming here, being brought by force, is not just because I wanted you to know us, but also because we love you and missed you terribly. Yet you come here with an attitude of superiority. Playing the role of the party done wrong. It wasn’t just you who suffered Valent.” Steaphan swallowed visibly and took a step back. “I must go from the room. I will return if you deem not to come down for the evening meal. Sorcha and her family leave tomorrow.” He stormed from the room, slamming the door behind him.

  Valent sunk into a chair and covered his face with his hands. What would he do? What did he truly want?

  If he was first born, lairdship of the clan was his birthright. Leading the McKenzies was something he wasn’t sure he could ever do. Yet, as laird, his station in life would change. And along with it came the possibility of offering a better life to Ariana.

  But as a McKenzie? Ariana and Ceardac would never agree to a union between them. His identical twin was the one who ordered both their brothers’ deaths.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Lily walked in the garden. The day was pleasant and she needed fresh air. The keep and its people were still not recovered from all the losses of the McKenzie invasion and, frankly, she found the gloominess oppressing to her spirit. She’d lost both parents as a child, didn’t have any family she knew of, so wasn’t affected as much as most of the clan’s people.

  Admittedly, she’d grown up with the laird’s children and felt some sorrow at Donall’s and Beathan’s deaths. Since neither ever treated her well, it was hard to feel more than a passing sadness. More than anything, it pained her to see Ariana and Ceardac hurting.

  Had something happened to either Ariana or Ceardac, things would have been horribly different. She loved them both with all of her heart.

  At thinking of Ceardac, she placed her palm against her breast and took a deep breath. How could it be that she could barely think of the man and her breath caught?

  Although she’d known him most of her life, it wasn’t until recently she’d taken more of a notice of how handsome he’d become, how much more sensible he was than the other brothers. He was rapidly becoming popular with the clan as a fair and strong leader.

  With beautiful eyes the color of a lush glen and sensual, full lips, Ceardac was a breathtaking man. Days earlier, when she’d been up late, they’d run into each other in a hallway and he’d kissed her. She’d been distraught over Ariana being ill and in bed without responding for two days when Ceardac happened upon her.

  He’d held her and when she looked up to him, he’d kissed her. It was soft, sweet and short. Over much too soon.

  “Lily, are you unwell?” The deep voice caught her by surprise and she gasped before turning to face the object of her ponderings.

  “I am fine. I just need some fresh air. It can be oppressing indoors.” She was gratified when he moved closer. “What brings you to the garden?”

  “I spied you from up there.” Ceardac pointed to the balcony of his bedroom. “I took the opportunity to talk to you alone.”

  Her heart skipped a beat. “Is something amiss?”

  Ceardac raked his fingers through his hair. She recognized this as a sign he was struggling with what to say and her stomach knotted. Whatever it was, it would not be to her liking. “I wanted to apologize for the other day.”

  “What? …oh, the kiss.” She felt her face heat and let out a huff in frustration. “There is no need. I found it quite pleasant and you helped distract me from my worries.”

  He nodded, his gaze meeting hers. “We’ve known each other a long time. I find it strange to not have noticed how beautiful you’ve become.”

  His words took her by surprise and Lily cleared her throat, not sure what to say in response.

  Ceardac finally tore his gaze away. “I will see you at the evening meal then.”

  “Wait.” She reached for his arm and he immediately stopped and looked to her. Lily wasn’t sure what to say to detain him, but she was not ready for him to leave. “How…are you? This has been a horrible terrible time for you. Not to mention all the added responsibilities.”

  His shoulders relaxed and his lips curved. “It has been an adjustment. Life is certainly not what I expected. But with each passing day, I find it becomes easier.”

  She looked to the keep. “I will miss my life here.”

  At her words, Ceardac’s brows lowered. “What do you mean?”

  “When Ariana marries Ross McLeod, I must go with her. I cannot remain here.”

  He gave her a curt nod and when he moved away, she did not stop him.

  Lily smiled. Good, she’d given him something to consider.

  She made her way inside and went directly to the sitting room in search of Ariana. Perhaps it was time to let her friend know how she felt about Ceardac. Ariana had hinted more than once about the possibility of a romance with the new laird. Although she was afraid to aspire to be his wife, she found i
t refreshing to have a small dalliance of sorts with the handsome man.

  Ariana turned from the window when she entered. Her face was drawn and not as vibrant as was the norm for her.

  “You should sit,” Lily said. When Ariana did not move, Lily joined her and looked to see what her friend spied.

  The land expanded for as far as the eye could see. Hills and valleys covered in lush green vegetation contrasted with the brightness of the blue sky. Barely whispers of clouds painted the expanse of the heavens.

  “It is a beautiful day,” Ariana said, her voice low and soft. “I will miss seeing these lands.”

  Lily let out a sigh. “I will miss the land and other things as well. My entire life, I have not known more than this.”

  “My brother? He…” Ariana started, then stopped. A tear escaped down her cheek.

  “What is it?” Lily was alarmed and took Ariana’s hand to lead her to a settee. “Don’t cry, I cannot bear it. You will make me cry, too.”

  Ariana looked to Lily and sniffed. “I have lost two brothers. I don’t want to leave Ceardac so soon, as well. Winter is almost here. The days will be short and nights long. I’m afraid he will suffer melancholy.”

  Lily wasn’t sure what to say to make Ariana feel better. “The way of things is that they constantly change. I, too, feel melancholy at the thought of moving away.”

  Ariana sniffed. “But there is naught we can do. Things have been decided for us. For me anyway. If you wish to remain here, of course, you can. But I do not think you will upon learning what I am about to tell you.”

  Her heart thudded against her breastbone and Lily lost her ability to breathe. “What is it?”

  Ariana let out a long breath as if fortifying herself. “Ceardac. He is to marry the Grant’s daughter.”

  “Oh.” Lily fell back into the chair and could not keep tears from falling. “When did you learn of this?”

  “Just earlier today. He informed me so I could prepare for his wife to take over the household duties.”

  Ariana immediately hugged her. The warmth of Ariana’s embrace doing little to console her. Until this moment, she’d not allowed herself to accept how deeply she felt for Ceardac. Just earlier in the garden, she’d hoped he would kiss her. But still, Lily had clung to the idea that it was just an infatuation. By the way her heart constricted, she could not help but acknowledge it. She loved Ceardac and the thought of him marrying another made her want to die.

  There was a throat clearing in the doorway. Lily didn’t have to look up to know it was he. His deep voice sent another wave of misery over her.

  “Is something amiss?” Ceardac asked

  Thankfully, Ariana went to him, saving Lily the embarrassment of him seeing her reddened face. “Lily is just emotional over a friend in the village who lost her husband. Is there something you require?”

  Lily did not pay attention to the conversation after that. Instead, she took advantage of the distraction to wipe her tears and blow her nose. From the corner of her eye, she caught sight of Ceardac looking to her, but he did not move to come closer.

  “Lily,” he spoke to her. “We all mourn, do not be distraught. Times will get better.”

  She nodded. “Aye, I know. Time will help. Perhaps when Ariana and I go to Skye, things will seem better.”

  “You will meet a handsome Scot and marry. Raise some bairns,” Ariana added.

  Lily looked to her, eyes wide, noticing Ceardac did the same. “Yes…of course. God willing.”

  * * *

  Ceardac entered his study and poured more than his usual amount of whiskey. Ariana’s statement disturbed him more than it should have. He did not understand why, but the thought of Lily not being part of his everyday life bothered him.

  Whatever possessed him to kiss her days earlier now rumbled in disagreement at him allowing her to leave.

  As laird, he had the right to demand she remain, but to what end? Ariana would be cross at him and Lily would be lonely. Not only that, but he was due to marry Genevieve Grant and it would not do to be distracted by Lily’s presence.

  From what he remembered, the Grant lass was plain faced and with a contrary personality. There were more than several reasons why the Grant had a hard time getting her married off. It was one thing to put up with an unattractive woman, but another altogether to deal with an off-putting personality.

  He let out a deep breath and looked up just as Murray entered. The warrior looked to Ceardac’s hand. “Quite early for a drink. Is something weighing on your mind?”

  It struck him that he wasn’t sure what bothered him more, his future marriage or Lily leaving. “I find myself questioning my decision in agreeing so quickly to marry the Grant lass.”

  “I wondered at that as well. It never is a good thing to make important decisions during times of chaos and change. However, it is done.”

  “Aye, it is.” Ceardac straightened in his chair. “What brings you, Murray?”

  His guard looked down as if pondering how to formulate the words. “How many more guardsmen will we be adding? I have four men outside who wish to join. None archers. Do you think Valent will return? He is missed.”

  “No. If, indeed, the McKenzies came for him, perhaps it is for the best. He was born a McKenzie after all. What is worrisome is that he knows everything about our clan, the training of our guard. Both the strengths and weaknesses of every man.”

  “Do you actually believe he would use it against us?” Murray went to the side table and poured a drink before downing it. “I had not considered this. Knowing Valent as I do, I cannot fathom he could fight us.”

  “I do not think he would. I find it hard to believe he will remain with the McKenzies. However, if he does, we will have to consider his knowledge if ever we go to battle against them again.” Ceardac held his glass out and Murray refilled it. “Murray, you must come up with new training drills for the men.”

  “What of Lady Ariana?”

  “I know of my sister’s affections toward Valent, the archer. Fortunately, she is to be betrothed to Ross McLeod. I may have to precipitate this occurring. Although, she surprised me by readily agreeing to the marriage.”

  Murray nodded. “I knew of it, but did not inform you. My loyalties were torn. I ask you forgive me.”

  “No need to apologize. As you said, these are trying times. I will have to speak to her and ensure she doesn’t plan anything. Now, let us speak about the rebuilding of the village.”

  * * *

  During the evening meal, the ambience was lighter than usual. Some of the warriors had hunted and successfully killed a large boar. Their exaggerations of the hunt brought rowdy laughter from their table. The contagious effects of the gaiety spread to the rest of the room. Except for his sister and Lily, who remained subdued.

  Ceardac leaned to Murray and mumbled, “The women do not seem to be enjoying the stories of the hunt.”

  “Perhaps we should attempt to make conversation, speak of something of a softer nature.”

  Ceardac shook his head at the warrior. Although Murray often tupped the maids and even once proposed to a woman, who later was found to be already married, he had little knowledge of conversing with them. “You go first.” Ceardac could not hold back a grin, so he pressed his lips together.

  Murray cleared his throat and turned to Ariana. “Lady Ariana, what do you think of boar meat?”

  Ceardac spit out his ale with a loud guffaw that had everyone turning to the high board.

  His sister looked to him then, ignoring him, spoke to Murray. “I love it. I prefer not knowing how the beast was killed, but it is good to eat.”

  Murray continued unabated. “And what of you, Lady Lily. Is boar your favorite meat?”

  Unable to keep from it, Ceardac watched Lily’s face as she pondered Murray’s question. “No, sir. I prefer deer or pheasant.”

  “What about potatoes, do you like them?” Ceardac asked, sliding a look at Murray.

  “Yes.” Lily looke
d to him and turned away to watch the guards who were pantomiming how one of them got tangled in a vine.

  Murray lifted a brow at Ceardac, obviously failing at keeping the woman’s attention so Ceardac persisted. “Lady Lily, what would you prefer? A walk in the moonlight or a stroll along the side of the loch during the morning hours?”

  Her widened eyes met his. Ariana gasped and Murray laughed out loud.

  The three of them watched, as Lily looked first to Ariana before meeting his gaze. Her expressive, large eyes swept over his face and immediately he regretted the question. Whatever her answer, he would endeavor to ensure to share the experience with her.

  “I am quite fond of walks in the moonlight, actually. Your sister and I often steal away after the evening meal to walk in the garden or on the path near the forest.”

  Murray instantly became a guardsman. “I hope you alert the guards. It is not safe to go about unescorted during times like these.”

  Ariana frowned at the man and let out a huff. She nudged Lily and both looked away to the guards’ table.

  They’d lost the women’s attention. Ceardac elbowed Murray and studied Lily’s profile. With a small, upturned nose and delicate features, she was like a wee forest Fae. Her graceful neck caught his attention next when she leaned forward in an effort to hear what the men discussed at another table. She had always been inquisitive. He remembered once, when he was about ten, plotting with his brothers to steal Ariana’s toys and bury them. They’d caught Lily hiding behind a curtain. She’d kicked him and gotten away, screaming like a wild beastie. She’d gotten his father’s attention and both he and his brothers had been punished for hitting her even though none had touched her.

  He’d been so angry, until she’d peeked around his father’s legs and stuck her tongue out which caused him to giggle.

  As if sensing his regard, she turned to him. He must have been smiling because her lips curved in response and his heart skipped a beat. The reaction shocked him so that when she looked away, he pressed his hand to his chest to ensure something wasn’t amiss.